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How to successfully raise children with a toxic ex-spouse

Many things lead to Indiana couples breaking up and getting divorced. It can be challenging for these divorced couples to co-parent after the divorce, especially when one of them is a toxic person. Here are some tips to help a co-parent successfully raise their children despite the challenges that arise from dealing with a toxic ex.

The first thing that a person will need to do after a divorce is set boundaries as to how and when communication will take place. Many parents have found that using email or a parenting portal can reduce frustration when communicating with a toxic ex-spouse. It also allows all conversations to be documented in case they are needed in a legal setting in the future.

A co-parent will want to be on hand for any emergencies that arise with the children. However, they are not on call for their ex-spouse when it comes to non-emergency situations. Some people have established a 'delay time" for responding to an ex. One benefit to not responding to communication immediately is that it allows the person to mindfully respond instead of emotionally react.

It is also good to realize that not everything needs to be responded to. The goal of co-parents is to raise the children and look out for their best interests. Communication outside of parenting can sometimes be completely ignored. It is best to keep the style of communication business-like.

After co-parenting with a narcissist for an extended period of time, some parents found that the situation is just too difficult. Parallel parenting may be a better option, or a person may need to contact an attorney to find out about filing a court order or modifying a parenting plan. An attorney may be able to provide more information about child custody, agreement modification, visitation rights and other matters that arise after a divorce.

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Robert Schembs
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Indianapolis, IN 46204

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